So I'm moving... This is the result of much procrastination. I felt that staring at a blank wall was less productive than this...
Bogart the bog was all a sad and gloom;
He was tired of being associated with imminent doom.
All he wanted was to live out in the warm sunshine;
Instead of beneath a dangerous abandoned coal mine.
Apart from that his life was comparatively great;
He had a family, huge and loving, and a couple of mates.
But being a teen silly Bog just didn’t see it:
He was content merely with throwing a fit.
His father, Fritz the blitz, gave him what he deemed to be “sage advice”;
“Son, see, the problem with the rest of the world is they just aren’t very nice.
We tried to make friends, we honest to good did;
They responded by chasing us straight off the grid.
I know here is tough to stomach, what with the smell;
But think of it this way: at least we’re all well.
We have food and friends and fun most of the time;
And we’re dry and warm here come rain or shine.”
At this point his mother stepped in;
“Fritz, give it a rest, you’ll never win.
That boy has his noodle all in a twist;
Why his face never shows anything but whist!
You should be glad you’ve been blessed with us;
Now quit your snuffling and cease with this fuss.”
And so, Bogart being the teenager he was, sulked all through the night;
He was ready to turn this thing into quite a fight.
So the following morning he packed his things;
He crept out the door, ready to spread his wings…
But:
It was not quite the adventure he’d had in mind;
Firstly the sun was so bright he thought he’d gone blind.
The world was so filled with hubbub noises and smells;
He’d never encountered such horrid olfactory hells.
Trudging back into his abandoned coal mine;
He began to rethink his dribble and whine.
He’d focussed on all the wrong issues in life;
And now he was sick of pessimism and strife.
The rest of his life should be all about good things;
Like eating and dating and reading about flings.
He’d have the biggest adventure of his life;
By beginning an earnest search for his future wife.
